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Heim Group
P.O. Box 1745
Pacific Palisades, CA 90272
(817) 562-3384
Toll Free (888) 917-7797
Fax (817) 562-3374
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Free Tips 
GenderSpeak Tips for the Workplace
Check back frequently for new Gender Tips each month.
The Situation: You don't get praise from your boss.
For the past month you have been slaving over a report that analyzed three strategic options regarding the future of some of your specialty stores. Last week you completed the report and put it on your boss's desk like your first-born child. You've been waiting for Harriet to tell you how wonderful you are, but you've only heard secondhand that she is pleased with your work. You'd really like her to pat you on the back for this job. So you ask Harriet for some feedback, and she replies, "Your report was just fine." You'd like a heftier pat. Do you work harder at soliciting positive feedback from Harriet?
The Solution:
Boys don't expect praise as much as girls do. They have outside, objective measures of success; all they need to do is check the score to know if they have won the game. Girls feel good about their success when others tell them they've done well. After all, no one keeps score in a game of dolls.
Women feel good about their work and their professional role in general when they get positive feedback. If the praise is absent, a woman begins to feel as if she's not doing a particularly effective job.
You may want and even relish positive feedback from your boss, but in reality some mangers just don't give it If you push, you may look like a dependent weakling.
If Harriet withholds praise, build a support system elsewhere. Get together with other peers to share information about what you're working on. Give each other the accolades you all need to keep on going and doing a great job.
Rule: Exchange praise with peers.
For more situation gender tips, read Smashing the Glass Ceiling, Tactics for Women Who Want to Win in Business.
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